There are many stories to be shared today. Yet, my show is already running late due to the lack of things I got done today.I did finish Christmas shopping, so that is a huge plus!
I also met 2 new friends! Kristyna & Marion. They were working at a gift wrapping table within Barnes & Noble Booksellers. I bought two books that I had been looking for to fulfill the need on my Christmas List.
As I exited the store I heard:
Would you like us to gift wrap that for you?
Oh, yes, that would be such a great help!
Great, it would be our pleasure to help you.
Well thank you very much! Whose dog is that?
This dog was the most beautiful Golden Retriever I've seen in a long time. It was wearing a Support Dog working vest so I figured these two ladies were involved in someway with assisting handi-capable individuals gain canine living assistants.
Oh, this is Cricket. He is one of our touch therapy dogs that we use to travel around to hospitals and nursing homes to lift the spirits of the patients and residents of these facilities.
That is so cool! He is beautiful. My name is Colin, I work at a veterinary hospital here in the St. Louis area. Cricket is one of the most handsome Goldens I've seen in a long time. What are you guys doing here?
We're raising money to assist homeless handicapped citizens during the winter season.
How are you raising the money? I'd love to help.
Uhm....gift wrapping.
Oh that makes total sense" I said bursting into a laugh
Yes, yes it does make sense" Kristyna said with Marion soon joining in to our laughter
How much is the gift wrapping? Although I've already committed to it.
It's based off how much you would like to donate, there is no set fee, here are your items.
Thank you so much, these look great" I grimaced trying to fake a smile because the two packages she just handed me were -in my standards- wrapped horribly, with not so attractive paper.
No problem! It was great to meet you, I hope you have a great Christmas.
You too, and here is one of our business cards, if you or any of your clients need anything that we can assist with, please give us a call. I'd be more than happy to try and help!
Thank you so much! That is such a great resource! Do you need change?
Oh no! I want to donate all twenty dollars. I hope it helps out. Have a great Christmas!
With a cold burst of wind, and an "excuse me", I was back outside the store walking toward my vehicle.
Thanks for tuning in. I hope you all see the significance of today's completed mission. No? Well here it is: When the time comes, you never know how your skills and services will be the greatest donation you can make.
Sure, I gave the Kristyna and Marion $20, but I also offered my business services. They may never use them, they may call tomorrow, but either way, the offering of my service gained more of a reaction than my monetary contributions.
At times we think that just because we have no money in our pocket book we cannot help the less fortunate. Yet -contrary to popular belief- I believe that most organizations would be grateful for the contribution of man-power. Money does help fulfill needs, but without the assistance of individuals, millions of dollars could go no where.
So thanks for tuning in! This is Colin.Always, and remember: Next time your pockets are empty and you see someone raising money, offer a card with your contact information and let them know you'd be willing to help.
Our hearts, and warm hearts are worth more than money can afford.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Mission Day: 6
Well today after work I had the daunting task of Christmas shopping for some last minute items. I was actually becoming more and more anxious as the hours of my shift passed. With the ticking of the clock I could feel my heart bead quickening, and my blood pressure rising. I knew that the time was coming when I, Colin Morrow, would have to brave the people of Jefferson County in a last minute rush to finish Christmas shopping on the final weekend before Christmas Day.
As I approached Jefferson County Plaza I could see the gaggle of vehicles that had filled the parking lot only confirmed my fears that I would in deed have to shank someone to get the last minute items I needed to complete my list.
I settled, I took the first spot I found; I didn't ask questions, I didn't look around, I just took the first one I saw, and walked the 300 - 400 feet to the door. Although, once I entered the warmth of my retail mecca, I realized that it really was not all the too chaotic inside. Sure, some of the departments were inundated with shoppers, the electronics department, toy department, and Christmas Seasonal Section were quite hectic, but all the other departments were busy, but not as bad as I was imagining.
I knew what I needed, and I pretty much got in, got what was on my list, did a little perusing of the aisles just to see what was out there, and proceeded to check out.
The Check-Out lane; where a good retail experience can quickly be left sour. Things can either be pleasant and you're out the door, or you can spend way more than you imagined, have a bitchy cashier, or even worse....FORGET YOUR COUPONS!!!
Just kidding....I don't really ever lose coupons; but you get the drift.
As I pushed my buggy toward the front of the store I was imagining the wait I was about to endure. But, I figured it would be a great place to fulfill my experiment and meet a new friend.
20, 19, 18, 17...the lanes ticked by as the lines grew longer and longer with each number that ticked by.
Sir, If you're ready to check out I can help you down here at Express" This lady in red said to me from about 15 feet away.
Could it by that Jesus has graced me with the most amazing gift for the day?!? Yes! God has shown his extravagant mercy once again and allowed this glorious angel of a cashier to be waiting just for me!
Oh that's okay, I have more than 10 items.
That's okay, my lane is open. I can help you right down here.
Oh thank you so much.
No problem! How are you today?
Pretty good! I found almost everything I needed, and I didn't have to pull out my shank.
That's a good one" the lady said as she began swiping my items across the magical reader of bar codes.
No, I'm just kidding, I left my shank in the car.
Hey, you're in here quite a bit aren't you?
Yeah, my name is Colin, I work right down the street at Vogel Vet. I'm in here at least once a week, but usually more.
I'm Tricia, I work here at Target. I'm here just about everyday.
Nice to meet you. You've checked me out before when I've been here. Are you already for Christmas?
No, I have to go to a mall at some point and get something my daughter wants from Forever XXI.
Oh good Lord, good luck with that. I will have to give you my shank! I promised myself that I would not go to the mall until after the holidays. I can only imagine how crazy it is there right now.
Oh I know, I get off at 5 and I'm going to go straight to South County Mall. I'm hoping that maybe some of the craziness will have died down, but I doubt that will be the case.
Yeah, I don't see that happening" I said laughing.
Yeah, me neither. May I ask why you have 4 of almost everything in your cart?
Oh," I said laughing "every year with a group of people I used to work with at my church, and for their gifts every year I do a "Colin's Favorite Things" theme to play off of Oprah. This year, these are all of my favorite things. There are two more things I need, but you guys didn't have them so I will have to go Dierbergs.
Oh how cool! That is such a great idea, I bet they love that.
Yeah they better! Well good luck with your shopping after work. I'm sure I'll see you again...as long as you make it out of the mall alive. Call me if you need back up!
Oh yeah, I'm sure we'll see each other again. Have a good holiday.
You too, have a great Christmas!
Oh thanks! You have a good Christmas too.
And with my purchases in hand, I was out the door and back into the brisk winter wind.
So, all in all my Target experience was quite pleasant for the final Saturday before Jesus' Birthday. It was far more pleasant than I imagined it could possibly be, and...I met a new friend; a friend that I know I will see again.
Definitely not as exciting as yesterday, but far more pleasant. And it must have really been because I think I've used pleasant about 1000 times in this episode.
So thanks for tuning in to Colin.Always. I'm the same Colin...only better!
As I approached Jefferson County Plaza I could see the gaggle of vehicles that had filled the parking lot only confirmed my fears that I would in deed have to shank someone to get the last minute items I needed to complete my list.
I settled, I took the first spot I found; I didn't ask questions, I didn't look around, I just took the first one I saw, and walked the 300 - 400 feet to the door. Although, once I entered the warmth of my retail mecca, I realized that it really was not all the too chaotic inside. Sure, some of the departments were inundated with shoppers, the electronics department, toy department, and Christmas Seasonal Section were quite hectic, but all the other departments were busy, but not as bad as I was imagining.
I knew what I needed, and I pretty much got in, got what was on my list, did a little perusing of the aisles just to see what was out there, and proceeded to check out.
The Check-Out lane; where a good retail experience can quickly be left sour. Things can either be pleasant and you're out the door, or you can spend way more than you imagined, have a bitchy cashier, or even worse....FORGET YOUR COUPONS!!!
Just kidding....I don't really ever lose coupons; but you get the drift.
As I pushed my buggy toward the front of the store I was imagining the wait I was about to endure. But, I figured it would be a great place to fulfill my experiment and meet a new friend.
20, 19, 18, 17...the lanes ticked by as the lines grew longer and longer with each number that ticked by.
Sir, If you're ready to check out I can help you down here at Express" This lady in red said to me from about 15 feet away.
Could it by that Jesus has graced me with the most amazing gift for the day?!? Yes! God has shown his extravagant mercy once again and allowed this glorious angel of a cashier to be waiting just for me!
Oh that's okay, I have more than 10 items.
That's okay, my lane is open. I can help you right down here.
Oh thank you so much.
No problem! How are you today?
Pretty good! I found almost everything I needed, and I didn't have to pull out my shank.
That's a good one" the lady said as she began swiping my items across the magical reader of bar codes.
No, I'm just kidding, I left my shank in the car.
Hey, you're in here quite a bit aren't you?
Yeah, my name is Colin, I work right down the street at Vogel Vet. I'm in here at least once a week, but usually more.
I'm Tricia, I work here at Target. I'm here just about everyday.
Nice to meet you. You've checked me out before when I've been here. Are you already for Christmas?
No, I have to go to a mall at some point and get something my daughter wants from Forever XXI.
Oh good Lord, good luck with that. I will have to give you my shank! I promised myself that I would not go to the mall until after the holidays. I can only imagine how crazy it is there right now.
Oh I know, I get off at 5 and I'm going to go straight to South County Mall. I'm hoping that maybe some of the craziness will have died down, but I doubt that will be the case.
Yeah, I don't see that happening" I said laughing.
Yeah, me neither. May I ask why you have 4 of almost everything in your cart?
Oh," I said laughing "every year with a group of people I used to work with at my church, and for their gifts every year I do a "Colin's Favorite Things" theme to play off of Oprah. This year, these are all of my favorite things. There are two more things I need, but you guys didn't have them so I will have to go Dierbergs.
Oh how cool! That is such a great idea, I bet they love that.
Yeah they better! Well good luck with your shopping after work. I'm sure I'll see you again...as long as you make it out of the mall alive. Call me if you need back up!
Oh yeah, I'm sure we'll see each other again. Have a good holiday.
You too, have a great Christmas!
Oh thanks! You have a good Christmas too.
And with my purchases in hand, I was out the door and back into the brisk winter wind.
So, all in all my Target experience was quite pleasant for the final Saturday before Jesus' Birthday. It was far more pleasant than I imagined it could possibly be, and...I met a new friend; a friend that I know I will see again.
Definitely not as exciting as yesterday, but far more pleasant. And it must have really been because I think I've used pleasant about 1000 times in this episode.
So thanks for tuning in to Colin.Always. I'm the same Colin...only better!
Friday, December 18, 2009
Mission Day: 5
Hi there, and welcome back to Colin.Always. on this Friday, December 18, 2009. Today was my day off, and I enjoyed my day by sleeping in until 8:30 am, and then spent the day relaxing, cleaning, doing laundry, and preparing for Christmas.
Christmas. The word alone stirs many emotions within me -and I'm pretty sure most Americans. With that single word emotions of joy, hope, dreams, warmth, and laughter can be stirred within the heart. Yet, with that single word the feelings of stress, worry, anxiety, loneliness, and distance invade the brain.
For me, Christmas is almost a 50/50 split. Don't get me wrong, I L-O-V-E Christmas; I love the music, the time spent with loved ones, the joy of giving myself and things to those who mean the most to me. I also start stressing come mid-August.
I worry that I won't find the perfect gifts for everyone, I worry that I won't have the money to fund my ideas, and I worry about spending time with everyone that I want. I get anxious when it comes to balancing my work and preparing for the holiday. It gets very stressful for me trying to find the time to do all my shopping, do all my wrapping, and still trying to do all the extra stuff that piles up during the season at work.
Christmas is a time when all of creation loses their minds and forgets their manners as well.
Today, during one of my many errands, I had to stop by Ben Franklin -a local craft store- to get some ribbon and stuff for wrapping my presents. I am going very traditional this year, and I'm wrapping all my gifts in butcher paper, and using thick paper-based ribbon to set off each package. I will have to admit they are truly beautiful. Look for my on Facebook to see some pics. I'll post them when I'm done wrapping them all.
Anyways, I stopped by Bread Co. on my way to Ben Franklin to get my daily dose of Ice Tea. I ran in -leaving my car running- checked out and filled my cup and was back to my car in literally less than 4 minutes. Now bare in mind that I did park in an actual parking spot; yet I did leave my car running. So, as I come out to the lot I look both ways before I cross the street -like any good kid would do- and as I looked toward the direction of my car I see an older man standing in front of my car. I thought that maybe someone had hit my SUV and they were waiting till I came out to give me their information, than I thought that maybe someone was just getting into their car next time mine and I was overreacting.
Once I crossed over to my car I quickly learned that the complete opposite was happening. I pulled out my clicker to unlock my car -yes, I can leave my car running without the keys in it- and with the unlock of my car, my horn sounded, and the man standing next to my car turned to see who was coming toward him.
Without hesitation, without a split second, and without a single question, this guy starts screaming at me.
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING LEAVING YOUR CAR RUNNING?
Excuse me?" I stated calmly.
WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST LEAVE YOUR CAR RUNNING ALL DAMN DAY WHILE YOU RUN ALL OVER TOWN?
Excuse me?" I stated a little less than calm
I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!?
Well, my name is Colin Morrow. I'm 25 years old, haven't been screamed at in public since I can't remember when; and I just ran in for less than 5 minutes to get an Iced Tea at Bread Co. Thanks for watching my truck.
I WASN'T WATCHING YOUR CAR TO HELP YOU. I WAS WATCHING YOUR CAR TO SEE WHAT JACK ASS WAS LEAVING THEIR CAR RUNNING FURTHER POLLUTING THE EARTH BECAUSE THEIR TOO DAMN LAZY TO TURN A KEY.
Well, -I said as cool and calm as I have ever been- I appreciate your concern for the environment; but I don't appreciate you screaming at me like I'm a child over something so asinine as me leaving my car that I pay for, running on the gas, that I paid to put in the tank. I drive an SUV, yes, but I don't think me leaving it running for 3 extra minutes made a glacier shrink anywhere.
WELL THATS WHAT YOU....
Sir, I do not know you, and I'm sure you don't remember but I just told you my name was. So I'm going to get into my SUV that is nice and warm still and leave you standing here screaming like an idiot over something as dumb as 3 minutes of emissions from my car. I appreciate your interest and passion in the environment, but screaming to a complete stranger about your thoughts and beliefs is no way to stir feelings of conviction with anyone. So, if you don't mind I'm going to leave now. I hope you have a nice Christmas, and make your resolution for 2010 to stop screaming at people you've never met.
And with that, I got into my SUV -which was quite toasty- shut the door, kicked it in reverse, and made my way -less than 500 feet- to Ben Franklin on the other side of the shopping plaza.
So Day 5 may not count as "meeting" someone, but I definitely learned what he was passionate about. I didn't learn his name -nor do I think I care too- I don't know how old he is or where he is from. What I did learn is that he's passionate about, well...either global warming or air pollution, or air quality, or low emission vehicles, or...well hell; I don't really know what the little bastard was passionate about.
Day 5 was the day I met an ass wipe of a man who -unfortunately- rather just scream about his beliefs before learning where someone is coming from. If I had to guess I would say he was a Southern Baptist (and I can say that because I am one).
So, I'm not sure if this really counts as meeting a new person, but I do know it counts as meeting someone I don't really want to see again...for a while at least.
Thanks for tuning in tonight. This episode is posting a little bit late, and I do apologize. This is Colin.Always. saying: Remember: Just because you're passionate about it doesn't mean everyone else is. You catch more bees with honey than vinegar. So talk nice...not like a flaming ass hole in the middle of a parking lot.
Christmas. The word alone stirs many emotions within me -and I'm pretty sure most Americans. With that single word emotions of joy, hope, dreams, warmth, and laughter can be stirred within the heart. Yet, with that single word the feelings of stress, worry, anxiety, loneliness, and distance invade the brain.
For me, Christmas is almost a 50/50 split. Don't get me wrong, I L-O-V-E Christmas; I love the music, the time spent with loved ones, the joy of giving myself and things to those who mean the most to me. I also start stressing come mid-August.
I worry that I won't find the perfect gifts for everyone, I worry that I won't have the money to fund my ideas, and I worry about spending time with everyone that I want. I get anxious when it comes to balancing my work and preparing for the holiday. It gets very stressful for me trying to find the time to do all my shopping, do all my wrapping, and still trying to do all the extra stuff that piles up during the season at work.
Christmas is a time when all of creation loses their minds and forgets their manners as well.
Today, during one of my many errands, I had to stop by Ben Franklin -a local craft store- to get some ribbon and stuff for wrapping my presents. I am going very traditional this year, and I'm wrapping all my gifts in butcher paper, and using thick paper-based ribbon to set off each package. I will have to admit they are truly beautiful. Look for my on Facebook to see some pics. I'll post them when I'm done wrapping them all.
Anyways, I stopped by Bread Co. on my way to Ben Franklin to get my daily dose of Ice Tea. I ran in -leaving my car running- checked out and filled my cup and was back to my car in literally less than 4 minutes. Now bare in mind that I did park in an actual parking spot; yet I did leave my car running. So, as I come out to the lot I look both ways before I cross the street -like any good kid would do- and as I looked toward the direction of my car I see an older man standing in front of my car. I thought that maybe someone had hit my SUV and they were waiting till I came out to give me their information, than I thought that maybe someone was just getting into their car next time mine and I was overreacting.
Once I crossed over to my car I quickly learned that the complete opposite was happening. I pulled out my clicker to unlock my car -yes, I can leave my car running without the keys in it- and with the unlock of my car, my horn sounded, and the man standing next to my car turned to see who was coming toward him.
Without hesitation, without a split second, and without a single question, this guy starts screaming at me.
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING LEAVING YOUR CAR RUNNING?
Excuse me?" I stated calmly.
WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST LEAVE YOUR CAR RUNNING ALL DAMN DAY WHILE YOU RUN ALL OVER TOWN?
Excuse me?" I stated a little less than calm
I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!?
Well, my name is Colin Morrow. I'm 25 years old, haven't been screamed at in public since I can't remember when; and I just ran in for less than 5 minutes to get an Iced Tea at Bread Co. Thanks for watching my truck.
I WASN'T WATCHING YOUR CAR TO HELP YOU. I WAS WATCHING YOUR CAR TO SEE WHAT JACK ASS WAS LEAVING THEIR CAR RUNNING FURTHER POLLUTING THE EARTH BECAUSE THEIR TOO DAMN LAZY TO TURN A KEY.
Well, -I said as cool and calm as I have ever been- I appreciate your concern for the environment; but I don't appreciate you screaming at me like I'm a child over something so asinine as me leaving my car that I pay for, running on the gas, that I paid to put in the tank. I drive an SUV, yes, but I don't think me leaving it running for 3 extra minutes made a glacier shrink anywhere.
WELL THATS WHAT YOU....
Sir, I do not know you, and I'm sure you don't remember but I just told you my name was. So I'm going to get into my SUV that is nice and warm still and leave you standing here screaming like an idiot over something as dumb as 3 minutes of emissions from my car. I appreciate your interest and passion in the environment, but screaming to a complete stranger about your thoughts and beliefs is no way to stir feelings of conviction with anyone. So, if you don't mind I'm going to leave now. I hope you have a nice Christmas, and make your resolution for 2010 to stop screaming at people you've never met.
And with that, I got into my SUV -which was quite toasty- shut the door, kicked it in reverse, and made my way -less than 500 feet- to Ben Franklin on the other side of the shopping plaza.
So Day 5 may not count as "meeting" someone, but I definitely learned what he was passionate about. I didn't learn his name -nor do I think I care too- I don't know how old he is or where he is from. What I did learn is that he's passionate about, well...either global warming or air pollution, or air quality, or low emission vehicles, or...well hell; I don't really know what the little bastard was passionate about.
Day 5 was the day I met an ass wipe of a man who -unfortunately- rather just scream about his beliefs before learning where someone is coming from. If I had to guess I would say he was a Southern Baptist (and I can say that because I am one).
So, I'm not sure if this really counts as meeting a new person, but I do know it counts as meeting someone I don't really want to see again...for a while at least.
Thanks for tuning in tonight. This episode is posting a little bit late, and I do apologize. This is Colin.Always. saying: Remember: Just because you're passionate about it doesn't mean everyone else is. You catch more bees with honey than vinegar. So talk nice...not like a flaming ass hole in the middle of a parking lot.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Mission Day: 4
Wow, today was just one of those days. It all started at 6:00am when I left my house for work. I just about got killed by a 1000 year old woman on her cell phone who either didn't know where she was going, or didn't know how to drive in the first place. She just went flying right through a red light at Kennerly & Tesson Ferry as I was trying to go to Bread Company. I mean seriously; of all the people I would be one to get killed going to Bread Co.
Then work was friggin' crazy all day long. I showed up early to ensure that the menial stuff got out of the way because I knew we had a hectic surgical schedule and a full appointment schedule. But the moment the phones turned over, and people started coming in the door it was non-stop. I didn't even get to eat my Bread Co breakfast sandwich, and then I didn't get to eat my lunch until 6:00pm!! I was so sad. My Bread Company -yes, i did have Bread Co for lunch too- sandwich was still good though, but it just wasn't the same 5 hours after it was made.
Anyways, I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to stop and pursue my goal for the day of meeting at least one new person because I didn't see anyone at Bread Co in the wee hours of the morning, and I didn't leave the office all day. Yet, I made it a point to stop somewhere I could at least hopefully bump into someone I could try to talk to.
So I stopped at Dierbergs to get some dinero from the ATM, and get something to drink. There amongst the fluorescent lights, over priced groceries, and fabulous Christmas music it happened....A woman about 70 years old -and quite possibly the same one who almost killed me this morning- slammed into me with her cart as she came out of an aisle.
Oh my Gosh I am so sorry. I wasn't paying attention to where I was going and should have stopped looking at my list." Said the lady
Oh, it's okay, I've been hit harder!" I replied, even thought it really did hurt like a bitch and I thought my right leg was going to have a dent in it for the rest of my life.
"Are you okay?"
Yeah, I'm fine it's no big deal. I don't think there was any permanent damage" Even though I was just about to burst into tears because she also totally slammed into my hand and bent my finger in an ungodly position.
"Well do you want my information in case you need to go to the doctor?
Oh my goodness no. It seriously isn't that big of a deal; I don't think I'll be going to the doctor. I promise it was okay. My name is Colin, I shop here all the time so I'm sure we'll "bump" into each other again!
Oh my, I bet you're right! My name is Lorraine, and I'm here quite a bit so I'm sure I will see you again soon. Next time I'll have to bring my special cart bumpers
And with that I lost it. I was laughing so hard with a complete stranger -and a 5' tall female senior citizen- in the middle of the Snack Pak aisle in Dierbergs. I was literally laughing so hard that I was seeing little stars in my eyes, and she was laughing so hard she was holding on the her cart. Although I'm not sure if she was laughing at what she said like I was, or if she was laughing at me.
Honestly, what she said wasn't all that funny, but the gestures she made and the way she said it just made me lose it. I was probably a little slap happy so that sure didn't help. Yet, this just goes to prove the reason I am doing this experiment: Even complete strangers can warm your heart with laughter if you just take the time to "bump" into someone.
Thanks for tuning in tonight to Colin. Always. and remember: Even life's accidents can be just what you needed to make you stop and enjoy life.
Then work was friggin' crazy all day long. I showed up early to ensure that the menial stuff got out of the way because I knew we had a hectic surgical schedule and a full appointment schedule. But the moment the phones turned over, and people started coming in the door it was non-stop. I didn't even get to eat my Bread Co breakfast sandwich, and then I didn't get to eat my lunch until 6:00pm!! I was so sad. My Bread Company -yes, i did have Bread Co for lunch too- sandwich was still good though, but it just wasn't the same 5 hours after it was made.
Anyways, I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to stop and pursue my goal for the day of meeting at least one new person because I didn't see anyone at Bread Co in the wee hours of the morning, and I didn't leave the office all day. Yet, I made it a point to stop somewhere I could at least hopefully bump into someone I could try to talk to.
So I stopped at Dierbergs to get some dinero from the ATM, and get something to drink. There amongst the fluorescent lights, over priced groceries, and fabulous Christmas music it happened....A woman about 70 years old -and quite possibly the same one who almost killed me this morning- slammed into me with her cart as she came out of an aisle.
Oh my Gosh I am so sorry. I wasn't paying attention to where I was going and should have stopped looking at my list." Said the lady
Oh, it's okay, I've been hit harder!" I replied, even thought it really did hurt like a bitch and I thought my right leg was going to have a dent in it for the rest of my life.
"Are you okay?"
Yeah, I'm fine it's no big deal. I don't think there was any permanent damage" Even though I was just about to burst into tears because she also totally slammed into my hand and bent my finger in an ungodly position.
"Well do you want my information in case you need to go to the doctor?
Oh my goodness no. It seriously isn't that big of a deal; I don't think I'll be going to the doctor. I promise it was okay. My name is Colin, I shop here all the time so I'm sure we'll "bump" into each other again!
Oh my, I bet you're right! My name is Lorraine, and I'm here quite a bit so I'm sure I will see you again soon. Next time I'll have to bring my special cart bumpers
And with that I lost it. I was laughing so hard with a complete stranger -and a 5' tall female senior citizen- in the middle of the Snack Pak aisle in Dierbergs. I was literally laughing so hard that I was seeing little stars in my eyes, and she was laughing so hard she was holding on the her cart. Although I'm not sure if she was laughing at what she said like I was, or if she was laughing at me.
Honestly, what she said wasn't all that funny, but the gestures she made and the way she said it just made me lose it. I was probably a little slap happy so that sure didn't help. Yet, this just goes to prove the reason I am doing this experiment: Even complete strangers can warm your heart with laughter if you just take the time to "bump" into someone.
Thanks for tuning in tonight to Colin. Always. and remember: Even life's accidents can be just what you needed to make you stop and enjoy life.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Mission Day: 3
Welcome back guys. Hope you are all getting prepared for Christmas; men, it is in nine days so you better get to the store ASAP to get your "special someone" a gift. Although if you're anything like me -which I'm sure you're not- you've had that gift since before Thanksgiving.
What is on you're guys' Christmas wish list? I haven't really thought of much that I "want" for Christmas. I know what I need, but most of the stuff I need can't be bought or given in a box with ribbons and bows.
I've learned as I've gotten older that Christmas is more about giving of yourself than the giving of merchandise. Unfortunately, I think that many people still believe it's all about what they can afford to put inside a box. It's sad really once you think about it. I mean seriously; sure, we all love to get those cool presents and things we've been waiting for all year, or that one present that someone heard you mention on a whim during a meaningless conversation.
But what does that bring us other than clutter, and stuff? I don't know, maybe I'm the only one, but I rather have the opportunity to spend an entire day with no interruption in the company of those that hold a special place in my soul. I rather have the opportunity to serve the "less fortunate" a warm meal, than get the Nike+ Sportband watch I've been looking at every time I go to Dick's.
I don't know. I just don't get it. Sure, I love nice "things" just like everyone else. I rather carry my Louis Vuitton wallet than some pleather piece from Big Lots; I rather drive my leather trimmed SUV with a Sunroof and upgraded sound system than a 1993 Toyota Tercel. But am I who I am because I have those things? To some people probably, but to those that mean something to me I am Colin. I'm not the Louis Vuitton Wallet.
And so, that brings me back to my year long mission. For those of you just joining me, I've made a pact with myself to meet at least one new person everyday, for 365 days. Mission Day 3 found me in the line at 8:04am at the Arnold Commons St. Louis Bread Company.
I usually use the drive thru at this particular location, but, being in the midst of my life-mission, I decided it would be best to go inside. So there I was, waiting in a line of people about 10 deep (with two registers going, the line was going quick). The woman in front of me was dressed with exceptional taste. She had beautiful java colored shoulder length hair (and looking back I think she might have been wearing a bump-it!!!) with a large houndstooth print trench coat, with black wide leg pants that led down to a red pair of heels about 3 1/2 inches tall. They were point-toed faux crocodile leather (yes, I can spot the real thing) the same red as fire engine. They were nice. Her coat was buttoned with the waist belt tied in a loose knot to the front. I could not tell what type of blouse she was wearing, but I bet it was nice.
She was checking her Blackberry, and had a lap-top in her bag, along with a good deal of papers and little books. If I had to guess I would say she was a sales rep/person of some sort, probably pharmaceutical.
The line became slow, so I took my chance.
I really like that coat. I said as I leaned in speaking over her left shoulder. But not in the creepy "let-me-touch-you-in-a-dark-alley" kind of way.
She looked back and said, "Oh, thanks. I've had it for a while, but it was so cold this morning that I brought it out officially for winter."
Oh yeah, It has been so cold lately. I have a nice winter coat, but I keep forgetting to take it to the dry cleaner.
Oh yeah," she said "that's the only thing I don't like about this coat is that it has to be dry-cleaned."
Yeah, if I could afford it I would have all of my clothes dry cleaned just so they could iron it and hang it for me. But even then I would procrastinate putting it up in my closet. If there was one thing I had to pick to change about adult hood I would pick laundry.
Really? Of all the things that is what you would pick? I would change my bank account so I could have all the nicest of everything.
Yeah, but money can only buy so much. I bet it's true what they say, Money can't buy happiness.
I think having nice things clothes, cars, and stuff is enough to make you happy.
With that, it was her turn to order. When she turned to walk away from the counter I said:
It was nice talking to you, My name is Colin. Maybe we'll see each other her again sometime.
Yes, maybe.
And with that she was off to her table and it was my turn to order.
I was shocked. Seriously, this woman who appears to be somewhat educated, in her mid to late twenties, and appears so well put together still thinks "things" is what is going to make her happy?
Now you don't have to believe in God or Jesus -which I do, and I feel are the only things that provide you the truest level of happiness- but you have to believe that there is more to happiness than having nice items. You cannot -in the year 2009- still believe that your Lexus is going to make you happier than the love of a sibling. In the midst of an economic depression you cannot still truly, in the deepest depth of your soul, believe that what you have will make you happier than who you are and who you have around you.
It makes me sad to think that there are still people out there trying to gain "things" instead of themselves. What does it take for someone to realize that who they are, how they treat others, and the impact they make are far more important than what car they drive, what clothes fill their wardrobes, or what shoes keep their feet safe from pavement?
I think I've just found something to add to my Christmas list. I wish, that everyone, regardless of who they are, what color they are, their sexual orientation, what they've done, who they've hurt. Despite where they live, what money they have in their accounts, or where their home is; I wish that every soul could feel the warmth of Love that leads them true eternal happiness.
Thanks for tuning in tonight to Colin.Always. Remember: When we all come to the gate to be judged it won't matter what we owned, or what we bought one another.
What is on you're guys' Christmas wish list? I haven't really thought of much that I "want" for Christmas. I know what I need, but most of the stuff I need can't be bought or given in a box with ribbons and bows.
I've learned as I've gotten older that Christmas is more about giving of yourself than the giving of merchandise. Unfortunately, I think that many people still believe it's all about what they can afford to put inside a box. It's sad really once you think about it. I mean seriously; sure, we all love to get those cool presents and things we've been waiting for all year, or that one present that someone heard you mention on a whim during a meaningless conversation.
But what does that bring us other than clutter, and stuff? I don't know, maybe I'm the only one, but I rather have the opportunity to spend an entire day with no interruption in the company of those that hold a special place in my soul. I rather have the opportunity to serve the "less fortunate" a warm meal, than get the Nike+ Sportband watch I've been looking at every time I go to Dick's.
I don't know. I just don't get it. Sure, I love nice "things" just like everyone else. I rather carry my Louis Vuitton wallet than some pleather piece from Big Lots; I rather drive my leather trimmed SUV with a Sunroof and upgraded sound system than a 1993 Toyota Tercel. But am I who I am because I have those things? To some people probably, but to those that mean something to me I am Colin. I'm not the Louis Vuitton Wallet.
And so, that brings me back to my year long mission. For those of you just joining me, I've made a pact with myself to meet at least one new person everyday, for 365 days. Mission Day 3 found me in the line at 8:04am at the Arnold Commons St. Louis Bread Company.
I usually use the drive thru at this particular location, but, being in the midst of my life-mission, I decided it would be best to go inside. So there I was, waiting in a line of people about 10 deep (with two registers going, the line was going quick). The woman in front of me was dressed with exceptional taste. She had beautiful java colored shoulder length hair (and looking back I think she might have been wearing a bump-it!!!) with a large houndstooth print trench coat, with black wide leg pants that led down to a red pair of heels about 3 1/2 inches tall. They were point-toed faux crocodile leather (yes, I can spot the real thing) the same red as fire engine. They were nice. Her coat was buttoned with the waist belt tied in a loose knot to the front. I could not tell what type of blouse she was wearing, but I bet it was nice.
She was checking her Blackberry, and had a lap-top in her bag, along with a good deal of papers and little books. If I had to guess I would say she was a sales rep/person of some sort, probably pharmaceutical.
The line became slow, so I took my chance.
I really like that coat. I said as I leaned in speaking over her left shoulder. But not in the creepy "let-me-touch-you-in-a-dark-alley" kind of way.
She looked back and said, "Oh, thanks. I've had it for a while, but it was so cold this morning that I brought it out officially for winter."
Oh yeah, It has been so cold lately. I have a nice winter coat, but I keep forgetting to take it to the dry cleaner.
Oh yeah," she said "that's the only thing I don't like about this coat is that it has to be dry-cleaned."
Yeah, if I could afford it I would have all of my clothes dry cleaned just so they could iron it and hang it for me. But even then I would procrastinate putting it up in my closet. If there was one thing I had to pick to change about adult hood I would pick laundry.
Really? Of all the things that is what you would pick? I would change my bank account so I could have all the nicest of everything.
Yeah, but money can only buy so much. I bet it's true what they say, Money can't buy happiness.
I think having nice things clothes, cars, and stuff is enough to make you happy.
With that, it was her turn to order. When she turned to walk away from the counter I said:
It was nice talking to you, My name is Colin. Maybe we'll see each other her again sometime.
Yes, maybe.
And with that she was off to her table and it was my turn to order.
I was shocked. Seriously, this woman who appears to be somewhat educated, in her mid to late twenties, and appears so well put together still thinks "things" is what is going to make her happy?
Now you don't have to believe in God or Jesus -which I do, and I feel are the only things that provide you the truest level of happiness- but you have to believe that there is more to happiness than having nice items. You cannot -in the year 2009- still believe that your Lexus is going to make you happier than the love of a sibling. In the midst of an economic depression you cannot still truly, in the deepest depth of your soul, believe that what you have will make you happier than who you are and who you have around you.
It makes me sad to think that there are still people out there trying to gain "things" instead of themselves. What does it take for someone to realize that who they are, how they treat others, and the impact they make are far more important than what car they drive, what clothes fill their wardrobes, or what shoes keep their feet safe from pavement?
I think I've just found something to add to my Christmas list. I wish, that everyone, regardless of who they are, what color they are, their sexual orientation, what they've done, who they've hurt. Despite where they live, what money they have in their accounts, or where their home is; I wish that every soul could feel the warmth of Love that leads them true eternal happiness.
Thanks for tuning in tonight to Colin.Always. Remember: When we all come to the gate to be judged it won't matter what we owned, or what we bought one another.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Welcome back everyone! It's Day 2 of the Meet-at least-one-new-person-a-day-for-a-year Mission. Yesterday was a great kick 0ff when I met LaTasha whens he came into my office to drop of some random information for some boot-leg pyramid scheme.
Today's experience was not so great. I was waiting in line to check out this morning at the gas station right up the street from work this morning. I had my usual Red Bull and a package of Hostess CupCakes. There was a gentleman complaining behind me about how long the line was. He was, in fact, being a doucher. I mean seriously, it was 7:15 in the morning and the gas station was busy as a mother. They had both registers going as fast as they could.
So anyways; I thought I would be funny, so I turned around and said:
I bet I have enough time to eat all this and leave without paying!
He just stared at me.
I'm just kidding, I'm not a stealer.
Nothing.
Well it was nice talking with you. I'm Colin Morrow. I work down the hill at Vogel Veterinary Hospital.
Nothing.
Okay, well, I hope you enjoy the rest of your day. Don't stay crabby forever.
And with that I was out the door. He was probably the most unfriendly person I've ever seen. All he did was complain in line, but then when I tried to be nice and talk to him, he was silent.
Why is that? Why is that some people are only happy when they complain? Why do people feel the need to complain about things out loud? Especially in public places when they're alone? How would that guy like if someone came to his place of employment and complained about how he was doing his job?
Sure, being an employee at a Convenience Store probably isn't the most brain busting job in America but it's a job. They work hard, they -all the employees of this particular station- are extremely friendly, and go above and beyond to make sure they're providing excellent customer service.
So, all-in-all, Mission Day: 2 didn't go so well. I didn't really "meet" anyone, but I tried. I know it's only been 2 days, but I think this is really going to be an eye opening experience in sociology.
Thanks for tuning in to Colin.Always on this, Tuesday, December 15, 2009. Remember: 10 Days till Christmas. Get your party hats ready, and celebrate the birthday of Jesus!!
Today's experience was not so great. I was waiting in line to check out this morning at the gas station right up the street from work this morning. I had my usual Red Bull and a package of Hostess CupCakes. There was a gentleman complaining behind me about how long the line was. He was, in fact, being a doucher. I mean seriously, it was 7:15 in the morning and the gas station was busy as a mother. They had both registers going as fast as they could.
So anyways; I thought I would be funny, so I turned around and said:
I bet I have enough time to eat all this and leave without paying!
He just stared at me.
I'm just kidding, I'm not a stealer.
Nothing.
Well it was nice talking with you. I'm Colin Morrow. I work down the hill at Vogel Veterinary Hospital.
Nothing.
Okay, well, I hope you enjoy the rest of your day. Don't stay crabby forever.
And with that I was out the door. He was probably the most unfriendly person I've ever seen. All he did was complain in line, but then when I tried to be nice and talk to him, he was silent.
Why is that? Why is that some people are only happy when they complain? Why do people feel the need to complain about things out loud? Especially in public places when they're alone? How would that guy like if someone came to his place of employment and complained about how he was doing his job?
Sure, being an employee at a Convenience Store probably isn't the most brain busting job in America but it's a job. They work hard, they -all the employees of this particular station- are extremely friendly, and go above and beyond to make sure they're providing excellent customer service.
So, all-in-all, Mission Day: 2 didn't go so well. I didn't really "meet" anyone, but I tried. I know it's only been 2 days, but I think this is really going to be an eye opening experience in sociology.
Thanks for tuning in to Colin.Always on this, Tuesday, December 15, 2009. Remember: 10 Days till Christmas. Get your party hats ready, and celebrate the birthday of Jesus!!
Monday, December 14, 2009
Mission Day: 1
So today marks the first day for my new life mission. Now you may be asking: What the hell is he planning on doing now? Yet, for all you nay-sayers our there; it's simple: I'm am starting a goal to meet at least one new person everyday for everyday of the year.
It all started when I was driving home yesterday evening, and people everywhere; there were people parked at every single store I passed; the highway was crowded, and all the side roads I passed seemed just as crowded. So I got to thinking: Isn't it weird that we go through life day-in-day-out and pass all of these people and will probably never meet?!? It kinda makes me sad to think of all those people I see everyday and I just pass on by.
So, here I am. I made the goal of meeting at least one new person everyday for one year. Yes, there are rules I have set for this experience. The following rules apply to my goals, there are as follows:
1.) If you know their first name, they do not count. This eliminates delivery men, sales reps, clients, and spouses of clients.
2.) Clients -even the new ones- do not count.
3.) Church members do not count. I can still meet them, but they do not apply to this goal.
4.) Each person I meet must be a complete stranger.
5.) Introductions via a colleague, acquaintance, friend, or relative do not count.
And thus begins the mission; and I am happy to say that day 1 went quite well...almost.
Today at work a woman came into the office to drop off some information -soliciting basically- for some weird pyramid scheme thing. She stopped to look at the kittens we have for adoption in my office, and I thought to myself: Here she is, my new friend for the day! Yes, I actually referred to her as friend. But then I didn't know if she would count because she's kind of a delivery person, but I've never seen her before. So anyways, I went for it.
She was really nice actually. The conversation went a little something like this: (I am in italics, her response is plain.)
Want to adopt a new kitten?
Ha ha ha, no. I have 2 cats and three kids. My plate is beyond full.
Yeah, definitely sounds like you have a lot going on! My name is Colin. Thanks for dropping this off, it looks pretty interseting.
Nice to meet you, my name is LaTasha. Yeah, I've been reading this more and more as I walk around the city. I guess you can call it interesting.
Oh, this isn't something from you directly?
Heck no. I don't do these stupid pyramid things. I mean please, I work for you, so you can make money off me, and I make less because I have to give you part of it? No thanks.
Ha ha ha
Although, with me not having a job and two kids to provide for, I may have to look into it soon! ha ha ha
Oh my, you lost your job?!? That seems to be a trend now-a-days. I hope you find something soon.
Yeah me too, my aunt new a lady who does this and she's paying me to pass out like 3000 of these things door to door. It's not much money, but I've gotta do something.
Well thats good, and hey, from the looks of this, when you become a Platinum Level Senior Vice President for them they'll make the payments on a Bentley for you. I bet there isn't a person in that company who has a Bentley!
Damn straight, no one up in there got a Bentley! You right about that.
What kind of cats do you have?
Just two black one, a boy and a girl. Rambo & Adrienne. They crazy.
Rambo & Adrienne, thats sooo cute! How old are they?
Uhm, they a little past one years old.
Well here, take these, hopefully they'll help you a little until you can find some good work, and heres one of our magnets if you need anything give us a call.
Really? Thank you so much, I've been doin' this all day long **It was only 10:30am! LOL** and you the first person who even told me their name. What are these (referring to the things I just handed her)?
Oh, they're a bunch of $5.00 off coupons that we get to use when people buy Hill's dog or cat food. You can use them at any petstore or vet.
Really? Five dollars...thank you so much!! Have a good day!
Hey, you too! Merry Christmas!!
Merry Christmas to you too!!
And off she went, with like, 9 or 10 coupons and our magnet. I will probably never see her again, but that's not the point. The whole entire point of this experience is to just meet people. To go deeper than surface, if possible, and try to help them anyway I can in the few minutes I have with them. For LaTasha, it was just a warm hello, a few questions, and some coupons that didn't cost me a penny, but will save her about $45 to $50.
I feel great about this experiment. I know that things will only get easier as each day passes, and hopefully as my life is changed a little bit each day, so will the lives of those I meet.
Tune in tomorrow at 11/10CST to see how day 2 goes.
This is Colin.Always. Remember: We are only as good as those we ridcule.
It all started when I was driving home yesterday evening, and people everywhere; there were people parked at every single store I passed; the highway was crowded, and all the side roads I passed seemed just as crowded. So I got to thinking: Isn't it weird that we go through life day-in-day-out and pass all of these people and will probably never meet?!? It kinda makes me sad to think of all those people I see everyday and I just pass on by.
So, here I am. I made the goal of meeting at least one new person everyday for one year. Yes, there are rules I have set for this experience. The following rules apply to my goals, there are as follows:
1.) If you know their first name, they do not count. This eliminates delivery men, sales reps, clients, and spouses of clients.
2.) Clients -even the new ones- do not count.
3.) Church members do not count. I can still meet them, but they do not apply to this goal.
4.) Each person I meet must be a complete stranger.
5.) Introductions via a colleague, acquaintance, friend, or relative do not count.
And thus begins the mission; and I am happy to say that day 1 went quite well...almost.
Today at work a woman came into the office to drop off some information -soliciting basically- for some weird pyramid scheme thing. She stopped to look at the kittens we have for adoption in my office, and I thought to myself: Here she is, my new friend for the day! Yes, I actually referred to her as friend. But then I didn't know if she would count because she's kind of a delivery person, but I've never seen her before. So anyways, I went for it.
She was really nice actually. The conversation went a little something like this: (I am in italics, her response is plain.)
Want to adopt a new kitten?
Ha ha ha, no. I have 2 cats and three kids. My plate is beyond full.
Yeah, definitely sounds like you have a lot going on! My name is Colin. Thanks for dropping this off, it looks pretty interseting.
Nice to meet you, my name is LaTasha. Yeah, I've been reading this more and more as I walk around the city. I guess you can call it interesting.
Oh, this isn't something from you directly?
Heck no. I don't do these stupid pyramid things. I mean please, I work for you, so you can make money off me, and I make less because I have to give you part of it? No thanks.
Ha ha ha
Although, with me not having a job and two kids to provide for, I may have to look into it soon! ha ha ha
Oh my, you lost your job?!? That seems to be a trend now-a-days. I hope you find something soon.
Yeah me too, my aunt new a lady who does this and she's paying me to pass out like 3000 of these things door to door. It's not much money, but I've gotta do something.
Well thats good, and hey, from the looks of this, when you become a Platinum Level Senior Vice President for them they'll make the payments on a Bentley for you. I bet there isn't a person in that company who has a Bentley!
Damn straight, no one up in there got a Bentley! You right about that.
What kind of cats do you have?
Just two black one, a boy and a girl. Rambo & Adrienne. They crazy.
Rambo & Adrienne, thats sooo cute! How old are they?
Uhm, they a little past one years old.
Well here, take these, hopefully they'll help you a little until you can find some good work, and heres one of our magnets if you need anything give us a call.
Really? Thank you so much, I've been doin' this all day long **It was only 10:30am! LOL** and you the first person who even told me their name. What are these (referring to the things I just handed her)?
Oh, they're a bunch of $5.00 off coupons that we get to use when people buy Hill's dog or cat food. You can use them at any petstore or vet.
Really? Five dollars...thank you so much!! Have a good day!
Hey, you too! Merry Christmas!!
Merry Christmas to you too!!
And off she went, with like, 9 or 10 coupons and our magnet. I will probably never see her again, but that's not the point. The whole entire point of this experience is to just meet people. To go deeper than surface, if possible, and try to help them anyway I can in the few minutes I have with them. For LaTasha, it was just a warm hello, a few questions, and some coupons that didn't cost me a penny, but will save her about $45 to $50.
I feel great about this experiment. I know that things will only get easier as each day passes, and hopefully as my life is changed a little bit each day, so will the lives of those I meet.
Tune in tomorrow at 11/10CST to see how day 2 goes.
This is Colin.Always. Remember: We are only as good as those we ridcule.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
It's been Twelve years....
So tomorrow will mark the twelve year anniversary of the day my sister was killed.
I'm not saying this to make all of you feel sorry for me, or to make you think I'm trying to come across as a great "survivor" of a tragedy. That moment in my life should have no affect on how you view me, because that one moment in my life is what has made me exactly who I am today. Most of you reading this probably didn't meet me till after that time, so I hope it in no way affects the way you view me.
So today I am going to use my blog for as a means of cathartic release. If you don't want to read any further fine; if you decide to continue reading my post than I hope that you use my thoughts to make you realize just how important family is.
I'm not sure if my mind has blocked out the memories of my sister as a means of protection, or if I really just don't remember; either way, it hurts. I remember the day she was killed. I remember the noise the two cars made as the metal twisted and bent in ways not intended for motor vehicles. I remember the feel of the grass as I sat there on the side of the road in awe as they tried to retreive her body from the car. I've never forgotten the moments I sat with Kirsten on the same shoulder as she cried our of fear and shock. I remember Mr. Cathers trying to help the best way he knew how; and the best he knew to do was sweep up broken glass, lights, and bumper from the road using a broom and his cowboy hat. No amount of time will ever earse the feeling I had as the ambulance pulled away with my entire family as I still sat on the side of the road.
I don't know if anything will ever bring back the lost memories. As much as they may hurt I hope they do come back becuase I long to remember the sound of my sisters voice. I hope to one day remember what she looked like, and the expression of her face. I try to play back memories after looking at her picture, yet nothing comes to me. I want to be able to explain to my children how cool, smart, and funny their aunt was. I long for the day that I can easily remember how cool it was to have her as a sister, and all that she did for me.
Today, all I can remember is the faces of people, the smells, the sounds, the tangible feelings, and emotions. When I try to picture faces of my parents, my family, and most of all the faces inside the casket all I see is empty space.
Since the day my sister died, I've gone to her grave only twice. I've never been more angry at my parents for a single thing more than I am at the fact they buried her two hours away. I understand that most of my dads family is buried there, and that he will be buried there too, but why did they have to bury her out there?
I at times do not understand some of the things my parents did during this season in my life; but then I have to remind myself that no parent is equipped to handle a situation of that magnitude. No parent is taught how to prepare to bury their child after 18 years spend together; nor are they ever taught how to provide a 13 year old the emotional support they need during a time like that.
I remember the days after the funeral sitting out in my backyard staring up at the sky wondering what it was like up there. I remember Lisa and Lauren coming to visit me and bringing me all the homework I was missing at school. I remember returning back to school and everyone looking at me like I had two heads; and feeling like I was completely alone. I remember the first time I went back to Social Studies class and Mrs. Vehlwald couldn't teach the class she was crying so hard.
Now, 12 years later ther are still so many unanswered questions. Questions I am too afraid to ask, and even more afraid to hear the answers. I hope that someday I will be prepared to ask those questions and hear the answers; but now, 12 years later I am not.
Why did everyone have to be witness to the worst day of my life? How did my parents know to not let me ride with them to church? How did my mom and dad know that I would have been in the back seat of a car that would be rear-ended at 55 miles an hour? What exactly did my sister die of? I may never know. I would like to someday, but today is not that day.
I miss my sister now -12 years later- more than ever. I miss not having what so many other people have. I yearn to have a connection to someone close to my age that so many others have. I've missed out on so many experiences that others have on a daily basis.
I wish I knew the one thing that I could do/say that would bring my sister back. If I knew, I would do it every hour, of every day, for 12 years; in fact, I would do it every hour, of every day for the rest of my life if I knew that it would allow me to spend that very day with her, here, on earth.
I'm not saying this to make all of you feel sorry for me, or to make you think I'm trying to come across as a great "survivor" of a tragedy. That moment in my life should have no affect on how you view me, because that one moment in my life is what has made me exactly who I am today. Most of you reading this probably didn't meet me till after that time, so I hope it in no way affects the way you view me.
So today I am going to use my blog for as a means of cathartic release. If you don't want to read any further fine; if you decide to continue reading my post than I hope that you use my thoughts to make you realize just how important family is.
I'm not sure if my mind has blocked out the memories of my sister as a means of protection, or if I really just don't remember; either way, it hurts. I remember the day she was killed. I remember the noise the two cars made as the metal twisted and bent in ways not intended for motor vehicles. I remember the feel of the grass as I sat there on the side of the road in awe as they tried to retreive her body from the car. I've never forgotten the moments I sat with Kirsten on the same shoulder as she cried our of fear and shock. I remember Mr. Cathers trying to help the best way he knew how; and the best he knew to do was sweep up broken glass, lights, and bumper from the road using a broom and his cowboy hat. No amount of time will ever earse the feeling I had as the ambulance pulled away with my entire family as I still sat on the side of the road.
I don't know if anything will ever bring back the lost memories. As much as they may hurt I hope they do come back becuase I long to remember the sound of my sisters voice. I hope to one day remember what she looked like, and the expression of her face. I try to play back memories after looking at her picture, yet nothing comes to me. I want to be able to explain to my children how cool, smart, and funny their aunt was. I long for the day that I can easily remember how cool it was to have her as a sister, and all that she did for me.
Today, all I can remember is the faces of people, the smells, the sounds, the tangible feelings, and emotions. When I try to picture faces of my parents, my family, and most of all the faces inside the casket all I see is empty space.
Since the day my sister died, I've gone to her grave only twice. I've never been more angry at my parents for a single thing more than I am at the fact they buried her two hours away. I understand that most of my dads family is buried there, and that he will be buried there too, but why did they have to bury her out there?
I at times do not understand some of the things my parents did during this season in my life; but then I have to remind myself that no parent is equipped to handle a situation of that magnitude. No parent is taught how to prepare to bury their child after 18 years spend together; nor are they ever taught how to provide a 13 year old the emotional support they need during a time like that.
I remember the days after the funeral sitting out in my backyard staring up at the sky wondering what it was like up there. I remember Lisa and Lauren coming to visit me and bringing me all the homework I was missing at school. I remember returning back to school and everyone looking at me like I had two heads; and feeling like I was completely alone. I remember the first time I went back to Social Studies class and Mrs. Vehlwald couldn't teach the class she was crying so hard.
Now, 12 years later ther are still so many unanswered questions. Questions I am too afraid to ask, and even more afraid to hear the answers. I hope that someday I will be prepared to ask those questions and hear the answers; but now, 12 years later I am not.
Why did everyone have to be witness to the worst day of my life? How did my parents know to not let me ride with them to church? How did my mom and dad know that I would have been in the back seat of a car that would be rear-ended at 55 miles an hour? What exactly did my sister die of? I may never know. I would like to someday, but today is not that day.
I miss my sister now -12 years later- more than ever. I miss not having what so many other people have. I yearn to have a connection to someone close to my age that so many others have. I've missed out on so many experiences that others have on a daily basis.
I wish I knew the one thing that I could do/say that would bring my sister back. If I knew, I would do it every hour, of every day, for 12 years; in fact, I would do it every hour, of every day for the rest of my life if I knew that it would allow me to spend that very day with her, here, on earth.
Blog Abuse....$50 fine or 6 months prison
So yeah, I've totally neglected my new found venture in blogging. Sorry for all of you who actually read this or actually give a crap.
Well it's 8:26am on Sunday morning and I am sitting in my usual pre-church respite....St. Louis Bread Company on Tesson Ferry. I love this place, why? Not only is the food good, and good for you; but the people are so interesting to watch.
I don't really have anything all that interesting to talk about today. :( Let's see....Uhm....I've been really crabby lately does that count as interesting? No?! Yeah that's what I thought too.
Well I am done eating my breakfast, and I am going to enjoy the morning edition of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch....I'm sure something in that will piss me off enough to blog about. After all, I'm sure there will be a few articles about that f-tard Mr. Obama!
This is Colin.Always. reminding you: If y'a wan'a be somebody, if y'a go somewhere, y'a betta' wake up and pay attention!
Well it's 8:26am on Sunday morning and I am sitting in my usual pre-church respite....St. Louis Bread Company on Tesson Ferry. I love this place, why? Not only is the food good, and good for you; but the people are so interesting to watch.
I don't really have anything all that interesting to talk about today. :( Let's see....Uhm....I've been really crabby lately does that count as interesting? No?! Yeah that's what I thought too.
Well I am done eating my breakfast, and I am going to enjoy the morning edition of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch....I'm sure something in that will piss me off enough to blog about. After all, I'm sure there will be a few articles about that f-tard Mr. Obama!
This is Colin.Always. reminding you: If y'a wan'a be somebody, if y'a go somewhere, y'a betta' wake up and pay attention!
Friday, September 18, 2009
Who the hell do you think you are?
So for those of you following me daily, you know that I have been at a veterinary conference the last half of the week. Today was the last day for the conference, and my last class ended at 3:30pm. So after my last class I packed up my stuff, talked to a few people before "officially" leaving, and stopped by the potty before the drive home.
As I left the Downtown St. Louis Hilton Ballpark to walk across the street to my car there were TONS of people on the street. Then I remembered there was a Cards vs. Cubs game tonight, so Kiener Plaza was hosting a HUGE pre-game event. I crossed S. Broadway, then waited to cross Walnut to venture over to the garage where I parked my SUV. As I was waiting there this black guy came up to me and asked if I wanted to buy some tickets.
"No thanks, I've already got plans tonight." I said politely.
"Oh, come'on you have to buy these tickets." he spit back.
"No, I'm okay. I just got off work and I'm headed home." I quickly replied.
"Work?!?" he said, as any non-respectable black man would say "I don't know who the fuck wears shit like that to work?"
Sidenote: I was wearing jeans, a Mizzou T-shirt, and a white zipper-down hoodie, and a pear of UGGs. Why? Because the rooms in the hotel were literally fReEzInG cold. The first day I wore dress shoes and dress socks, by the end of the day I couldn't feel my toes, honestly. The second day I wore thicker socks, and dress-casual boots....still couldn't feel my toes. So, I said: Forget it. They all know it's cold in there so I'm going to wear my UGGs and they'll get over it.
Back to story: "Excuse me? Get a real job and then tell me about what people wear to work." I snarled.
And with that, the signal changed and I started to make my way across Walnut to the garage.
So seriously, who the hell does he think he is? What the fuck is his problem? Who the hell does that negro is telling me what is wrong with my clothes? Last time I checked, he was in jeans 4 sizes to big that were hanging past his ENTIRE ass, an also 4 size to big T-shirt that was plain white, and a pair of whack ass Nike shox.
First of all, what black man have you EVER seen in Nike Shox?!? Those are white people shoes.
Second, how the hell can he tell me about my clothes when his are hanging off of him?
Third, how the fuck would he know what people wear to work becuase I'm pretty damn sure he doesn't have a job.
People are freakin' jack asses, and I'm sorry to say, that a vast majority of the people who say stupid shit like that, are in fact, black. Why is that? Did someone not teach them the mantra: IF you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything.
It's never a dull moment in my life. Why is that? I swear I try to not be dramatic.
I guess it's like this so I can share it with all of you. I am off to clean the damn house so Dan can have people over for his birthday tomorrow night.
As always, this is Colin.Always sayin: Peace out bitches.
As I left the Downtown St. Louis Hilton Ballpark to walk across the street to my car there were TONS of people on the street. Then I remembered there was a Cards vs. Cubs game tonight, so Kiener Plaza was hosting a HUGE pre-game event. I crossed S. Broadway, then waited to cross Walnut to venture over to the garage where I parked my SUV. As I was waiting there this black guy came up to me and asked if I wanted to buy some tickets.
"No thanks, I've already got plans tonight." I said politely.
"Oh, come'on you have to buy these tickets." he spit back.
"No, I'm okay. I just got off work and I'm headed home." I quickly replied.
"Work?!?" he said, as any non-respectable black man would say "I don't know who the fuck wears shit like that to work?"
Sidenote: I was wearing jeans, a Mizzou T-shirt, and a white zipper-down hoodie, and a pear of UGGs. Why? Because the rooms in the hotel were literally fReEzInG cold. The first day I wore dress shoes and dress socks, by the end of the day I couldn't feel my toes, honestly. The second day I wore thicker socks, and dress-casual boots....still couldn't feel my toes. So, I said: Forget it. They all know it's cold in there so I'm going to wear my UGGs and they'll get over it.
Back to story: "Excuse me? Get a real job and then tell me about what people wear to work." I snarled.
And with that, the signal changed and I started to make my way across Walnut to the garage.
So seriously, who the hell does he think he is? What the fuck is his problem? Who the hell does that negro is telling me what is wrong with my clothes? Last time I checked, he was in jeans 4 sizes to big that were hanging past his ENTIRE ass, an also 4 size to big T-shirt that was plain white, and a pair of whack ass Nike shox.
First of all, what black man have you EVER seen in Nike Shox?!? Those are white people shoes.
Second, how the hell can he tell me about my clothes when his are hanging off of him?
Third, how the fuck would he know what people wear to work becuase I'm pretty damn sure he doesn't have a job.
People are freakin' jack asses, and I'm sorry to say, that a vast majority of the people who say stupid shit like that, are in fact, black. Why is that? Did someone not teach them the mantra: IF you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything.
It's never a dull moment in my life. Why is that? I swear I try to not be dramatic.
I guess it's like this so I can share it with all of you. I am off to clean the damn house so Dan can have people over for his birthday tomorrow night.
As always, this is Colin.Always sayin: Peace out bitches.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Selfless acts can't be done for attention
Welcome back everyone! Last nights episode was a background for tonights episode.
What do you think of when you hear "Pay it forward"? I'm not always 100% convinced everyone is aware of a key factor in gracious acts. I feel very confident that a vast majority of gracious acts are done for one reason: recognition.
The point of selfless acts is just that....selflessness.
There is a great travisty that occurs when people begin to do seemingly great acts of philanthropy for attention. Not only are they -most likely- only doing the deed to make themselves look better; they are essentially ruining the entire act for a complete society.
Honestly, thats all for tonight. I am exhausted, jut got into a fight with my girlfriend, and have to be up at 6am for the final day of my veterinary conference downtown. Plus, I have to drop a hot one and I want to just get ready for bed while i'm in the bathroom.
I love all you bitches who are reading this, and hope you're enjoying this as much as I am.
It's 10:11pm, and this is Colin.Always. Hoping that tomorrow you find an opportunity to do something selfless for anyone you see. So, stay classy, Always.
What do you think of when you hear "Pay it forward"? I'm not always 100% convinced everyone is aware of a key factor in gracious acts. I feel very confident that a vast majority of gracious acts are done for one reason: recognition.
The point of selfless acts is just that....selflessness.
There is a great travisty that occurs when people begin to do seemingly great acts of philanthropy for attention. Not only are they -most likely- only doing the deed to make themselves look better; they are essentially ruining the entire act for a complete society.
Honestly, thats all for tonight. I am exhausted, jut got into a fight with my girlfriend, and have to be up at 6am for the final day of my veterinary conference downtown. Plus, I have to drop a hot one and I want to just get ready for bed while i'm in the bathroom.
I love all you bitches who are reading this, and hope you're enjoying this as much as I am.
It's 10:11pm, and this is Colin.Always. Hoping that tomorrow you find an opportunity to do something selfless for anyone you see. So, stay classy, Always.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Intro to Pay it Forward
Well, for those of you that follow me on facebook, you already know today’s show topic. For those of you that don't follow me there, today I will be discussing my event in downtown and about the “pay it forward” philosophy.
During my veterinary conference –which was being held at the Hilton St. Louis Ballpark- we broke for lunch and I ventured outside. I quickly decided to make the trek 0.3 miles –as informed by my iPhone- to St. Louis Bread Company where I would enjoy a delicious grilled cheese sandwich, cold apple, and Iced Tea. After acquiring the desire of my stomach, I quickly headed back outdoors to enjoy the sunshine, and practice my sociology skills by people watching.
As I sat at my black wire table, in my matching black wire chair I watched as droves of people passed by me. Bite after bite my desires quickly maturated into fulfillment. My stomach gained what it had been longing for, and my brains epicenter was inundated with feelings of satisfaction.
I watched as droves of people passed by my table. Some were on their phones, some were alone, many were with others, and quite a few were dressed in Cardinals Fan attire. There was a game at Busch Stadium –one block away- that started in 35 minutes; and fans were making their way to the event. As these guests made their way into my brains thought processes I began to wonder who they were.
Where did they come from? What are they doing downtown? How has their day been thus far? Did they have a bad day? Who were they talking to on the other end of that phone? Are they of heavy heart or joyful spirit? How were they raised? Who raised them? Were they brought up in a family with a mom and a dad or just a mom or a dad? Were they raised by their grandparents? Perhaps children of the foster care system? Does he know Jesus? Why is that woman wearing a black shapeless dress with black leggings, and white Easy Spirit tennis shoes?
Then, it happened.
Across the street at Lion’s Choice, a middle-aged (48-52 years of age) woman, wearing a sage green blouse, matching floral print calf length skirt, glasses, and salt-and-pepper hair, exited the restaurant –much as I had done- to enjoy her mid-day meal outdoors. The woman’s hair was cut just at ear length, and the style looked as if she curled it and then brushed through the curls to maintain some of the volume, but give it a softer look. Her shoes were sling backs with a peep toe, saddle in color, and most likely of Clarks or Aresole brand. She was of dark olive complexion, and I imagined her to be either of Mexican or Samoan decent. She was mildly over weight at about 5’9” tall.
Her tray contained what looked to be a well-balanced, health conscious meal of garden salad –most likely containing special ingredients such as chicken or turkey, a knife, a fork, napkins, and a medium drink.
Now; anyone who has ever dined at Lion’s Choice is aware of two key factors: they have the best ice, and cups of any place, hands-down. A drink from Lion’s Choice is not just a means to quench thirst and provide a certain level of hydration, but an escape for 40% of your body’s senses. The taste is one of extreme freshness, and the feeling of the crushed ice within your mouth is pure bliss. Therefore, despite what liquid is contained within the walls of that Styrofoam vessel, it is sure to be an experience, not just a drink.
As the stranger passed through the door something happened causing her tray to become unbalanced. And with a SPLAT that Styrofoam cup hit the pavement, leaving a splattering of liquid all over. The lid and straw combination landed inches away from the cup, whose bottom had busted out with the impact. Ice was strewn about and the splattering of liquid quickly increased in size with each passing second.
The look on the woman’s face was one of shock in response to the event that just transpired. Her face quickly morphed into one of embarrassment, and sadness. The woman was reminded of the fact that it was lunch time in downtown St. Louis on the day of a Cardinals home game. She shuffled about trying to right the wrong she perceived she just committed. What most of us saw as an accident; she probably viewed as a travesty to those around her. No one offered the stranger any assistance. Steps were lengthened to avoid the splatter; shuffles were made to accommodate the large puddle of liquid and ice. As the woman stooped to pick up the cup and the lid/straw apparatus, she struggled to maintain balance of the tray containing her remaining, intact, salad, utensils, and napkins.
After shepherding the remnants of her beverage into a nearby trashcan, she made her way to a table to take refuge against the stream of people she once battled to clear her mess. She did not return indoors to gain another drink, but settled for what was left of her lunch and –I hope- vowed to enjoy what was left.
Shortly after taking her seat at the table, a woman –most likely a co-worker because they had matching name plates affixed to their blouses- sat down at the table with the stranger that had now pirated my thoughts.
Who is she? Where does she work? Did she get treated like crap at work today by complete strangers like I do every day? Does she like her job? How long has she been there? Does she like the woman sitting with her or is she just a convenient lunch date? What has her life been like? Are both of her parents still alive? What is it like to have your parents die before you? Are her shoes as comfortable as they look, because they better be to be that ugly?
About thirty seconds after her drink splattered atop the pavement I had already sub-consciously decided that I was going to replace that drink for her if she didn’t do so herself. So it was decided. She did not replace the drink that she had vowed to enjoy when she passed her hard earned money across the counter after ordering, so I was.
Shortly after the strangers lunch date made their self comfortable at their table, I had finished my grilled cheese and apple. I packed up the few items I had removed from my bag during my lunch, gathered my refuge from the meal, deposited it into the proper receptacle, and made my way to the cross walk. I was moments away from an interaction with a complete stranger that could either make me look like a caring stranger, or a complete weirdo.
My brain quickly commandeered and erased the feelings my conscious activated. Colin, what the hell are you doing? This woman is going to think you’re a freakin’ weirdo. She’ll take one look at that cup and wonder what you put in it. Why the hell are you going to spend your money on a complete stranger? You’re stupid, just take your ass back to the Hilton and move on. If she wanted a drink so damn bad she would have gone in there and got a new one.
“Excuse me” said the lady who was in line behind me at the crosswalk.
This was her polite way of making me away that foot traffic was moving. The signal had changed alerting us we had permission to cross the street with caution.
Before I knew it I was across the street, and had found my way inside Lion’s Choice taking a place in line to order. The line progressed quickly and within minutes I had passed my Visa over to the woman behind the counter to pay $1.78 for a new cup. Yet this was more than just a cup. This was a vessel that contained what the woman had once possessed. This hollow piece of Styrofoam was a visual reminder of a gracious act.
Within my hand I grasped a cup that had the potential to change the course of a stranger’s day.
I proceeded to place a straw and lid within the walls of cup; all while wishing I knew what the woman was intending to drink so I could make the act even more complete. I thought to myself: I bet she had Diet Coke or Iced Tea, after all she is eating a salad. Why would she ruin the health of a salad with something like regular Coke or Dr. Pepper?
I opened to portal to the outdoors and made a sharp left to make my way to the woman’s table. As I made the turn a sharp breeze began to flow and I was forced to close my eyes to protect them from the debris that swirled about. The breeze quickly calmed, and I was able to open my eyes revealing that I was less than 10 feet from the alien that had monopolized my thoughts for the past 7-10 minutes.
“Excuse me, I was sitting across the street at St. Louis Bread Company” I said as I gestured to the table that once served as my respite from the day thus far.
“I couldn’t help but notice that you had dropped your drink on the ground. I thought that I would get this for you to replace it.” With that I passed the woman her new cup and flashed a smile.
“Really?” she questioned as her face contorted to display a level of shock just as she had when the drink she possessed met its demise, on the cement.
“Yeah,” I said, “I just felt bad, and I just wanted to do this for you to let you know I cared.”
“Thank you so much!” the stranger uttered, as she looked up at me, catching the sun in her eyes causing a quick squint to cross her brow.
And as quickly as it all had happened, it was over.
Tune in tomorrow for Volume 1 Issue 4 where I will discuss my views on Paying it Forward…with 18%APR.
It’s 12:08am and this is Colin.Always. As always, telling you to keep it classy.
During my veterinary conference –which was being held at the Hilton St. Louis Ballpark- we broke for lunch and I ventured outside. I quickly decided to make the trek 0.3 miles –as informed by my iPhone- to St. Louis Bread Company where I would enjoy a delicious grilled cheese sandwich, cold apple, and Iced Tea. After acquiring the desire of my stomach, I quickly headed back outdoors to enjoy the sunshine, and practice my sociology skills by people watching.
As I sat at my black wire table, in my matching black wire chair I watched as droves of people passed by me. Bite after bite my desires quickly maturated into fulfillment. My stomach gained what it had been longing for, and my brains epicenter was inundated with feelings of satisfaction.
I watched as droves of people passed by my table. Some were on their phones, some were alone, many were with others, and quite a few were dressed in Cardinals Fan attire. There was a game at Busch Stadium –one block away- that started in 35 minutes; and fans were making their way to the event. As these guests made their way into my brains thought processes I began to wonder who they were.
Where did they come from? What are they doing downtown? How has their day been thus far? Did they have a bad day? Who were they talking to on the other end of that phone? Are they of heavy heart or joyful spirit? How were they raised? Who raised them? Were they brought up in a family with a mom and a dad or just a mom or a dad? Were they raised by their grandparents? Perhaps children of the foster care system? Does he know Jesus? Why is that woman wearing a black shapeless dress with black leggings, and white Easy Spirit tennis shoes?
Then, it happened.
Across the street at Lion’s Choice, a middle-aged (48-52 years of age) woman, wearing a sage green blouse, matching floral print calf length skirt, glasses, and salt-and-pepper hair, exited the restaurant –much as I had done- to enjoy her mid-day meal outdoors. The woman’s hair was cut just at ear length, and the style looked as if she curled it and then brushed through the curls to maintain some of the volume, but give it a softer look. Her shoes were sling backs with a peep toe, saddle in color, and most likely of Clarks or Aresole brand. She was of dark olive complexion, and I imagined her to be either of Mexican or Samoan decent. She was mildly over weight at about 5’9” tall.
Her tray contained what looked to be a well-balanced, health conscious meal of garden salad –most likely containing special ingredients such as chicken or turkey, a knife, a fork, napkins, and a medium drink.
Now; anyone who has ever dined at Lion’s Choice is aware of two key factors: they have the best ice, and cups of any place, hands-down. A drink from Lion’s Choice is not just a means to quench thirst and provide a certain level of hydration, but an escape for 40% of your body’s senses. The taste is one of extreme freshness, and the feeling of the crushed ice within your mouth is pure bliss. Therefore, despite what liquid is contained within the walls of that Styrofoam vessel, it is sure to be an experience, not just a drink.
As the stranger passed through the door something happened causing her tray to become unbalanced. And with a SPLAT that Styrofoam cup hit the pavement, leaving a splattering of liquid all over. The lid and straw combination landed inches away from the cup, whose bottom had busted out with the impact. Ice was strewn about and the splattering of liquid quickly increased in size with each passing second.
The look on the woman’s face was one of shock in response to the event that just transpired. Her face quickly morphed into one of embarrassment, and sadness. The woman was reminded of the fact that it was lunch time in downtown St. Louis on the day of a Cardinals home game. She shuffled about trying to right the wrong she perceived she just committed. What most of us saw as an accident; she probably viewed as a travesty to those around her. No one offered the stranger any assistance. Steps were lengthened to avoid the splatter; shuffles were made to accommodate the large puddle of liquid and ice. As the woman stooped to pick up the cup and the lid/straw apparatus, she struggled to maintain balance of the tray containing her remaining, intact, salad, utensils, and napkins.
After shepherding the remnants of her beverage into a nearby trashcan, she made her way to a table to take refuge against the stream of people she once battled to clear her mess. She did not return indoors to gain another drink, but settled for what was left of her lunch and –I hope- vowed to enjoy what was left.
Shortly after taking her seat at the table, a woman –most likely a co-worker because they had matching name plates affixed to their blouses- sat down at the table with the stranger that had now pirated my thoughts.
Who is she? Where does she work? Did she get treated like crap at work today by complete strangers like I do every day? Does she like her job? How long has she been there? Does she like the woman sitting with her or is she just a convenient lunch date? What has her life been like? Are both of her parents still alive? What is it like to have your parents die before you? Are her shoes as comfortable as they look, because they better be to be that ugly?
About thirty seconds after her drink splattered atop the pavement I had already sub-consciously decided that I was going to replace that drink for her if she didn’t do so herself. So it was decided. She did not replace the drink that she had vowed to enjoy when she passed her hard earned money across the counter after ordering, so I was.
Shortly after the strangers lunch date made their self comfortable at their table, I had finished my grilled cheese and apple. I packed up the few items I had removed from my bag during my lunch, gathered my refuge from the meal, deposited it into the proper receptacle, and made my way to the cross walk. I was moments away from an interaction with a complete stranger that could either make me look like a caring stranger, or a complete weirdo.
My brain quickly commandeered and erased the feelings my conscious activated. Colin, what the hell are you doing? This woman is going to think you’re a freakin’ weirdo. She’ll take one look at that cup and wonder what you put in it. Why the hell are you going to spend your money on a complete stranger? You’re stupid, just take your ass back to the Hilton and move on. If she wanted a drink so damn bad she would have gone in there and got a new one.
“Excuse me” said the lady who was in line behind me at the crosswalk.
This was her polite way of making me away that foot traffic was moving. The signal had changed alerting us we had permission to cross the street with caution.
Before I knew it I was across the street, and had found my way inside Lion’s Choice taking a place in line to order. The line progressed quickly and within minutes I had passed my Visa over to the woman behind the counter to pay $1.78 for a new cup. Yet this was more than just a cup. This was a vessel that contained what the woman had once possessed. This hollow piece of Styrofoam was a visual reminder of a gracious act.
Within my hand I grasped a cup that had the potential to change the course of a stranger’s day.
I proceeded to place a straw and lid within the walls of cup; all while wishing I knew what the woman was intending to drink so I could make the act even more complete. I thought to myself: I bet she had Diet Coke or Iced Tea, after all she is eating a salad. Why would she ruin the health of a salad with something like regular Coke or Dr. Pepper?
I opened to portal to the outdoors and made a sharp left to make my way to the woman’s table. As I made the turn a sharp breeze began to flow and I was forced to close my eyes to protect them from the debris that swirled about. The breeze quickly calmed, and I was able to open my eyes revealing that I was less than 10 feet from the alien that had monopolized my thoughts for the past 7-10 minutes.
“Excuse me, I was sitting across the street at St. Louis Bread Company” I said as I gestured to the table that once served as my respite from the day thus far.
“I couldn’t help but notice that you had dropped your drink on the ground. I thought that I would get this for you to replace it.” With that I passed the woman her new cup and flashed a smile.
“Really?” she questioned as her face contorted to display a level of shock just as she had when the drink she possessed met its demise, on the cement.
“Yeah,” I said, “I just felt bad, and I just wanted to do this for you to let you know I cared.”
“Thank you so much!” the stranger uttered, as she looked up at me, catching the sun in her eyes causing a quick squint to cross her brow.
And as quickly as it all had happened, it was over.
Tune in tomorrow for Volume 1 Issue 4 where I will discuss my views on Paying it Forward…with 18%APR.
It’s 12:08am and this is Colin.Always. As always, telling you to keep it classy.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
If you want a damn job use your brain
Volume 1 Issue 2
So recently I have had the daunting task of trying to hire 2 new employees at the hospital. One position is for a part-time, possibly full-time, Client Care Representative; and the other is for a part-time assistant . My current CCR has started attending vet tech school and is unavailable a vast majority of the day. Then my current assistant has decided to go full time at the local Animal Emergency Clinic. Thus, the process of hiring begins. It is-and always has been- extremely stressful. It is so hard to judge someone by just a piece of paper; yet it must be done.
I posted an ad on Craigslist.org Tuesday of last week at 9am and also posted the information on my Facebook page so all of my fellow vet friends could see the opportunity. I figured that I would get a few responses that day, and gain a few more during the week. Well, by 11am I had received a total of 47 resumes. So, within 2 hours I had 47; that's more than 20 an hour, almost 1 resume every 3 minutes! I was excited, but my excitement quickly faded to stress and fear at the task that lie ahead.
After looking at about 10 submissions -most a cover letter of some sort and a resume- it became evident that the rate of submission was not going to be enough for me to find the person i needed. I was astounded, disgusted, and ashamed at some of the resumes I had to read. So, as a favor to the world -many of which I believe are currently looking for a job- I am going to tell you just a few things that us managers look for in a resume.
So recently I have had the daunting task of trying to hire 2 new employees at the hospital. One position is for a part-time, possibly full-time, Client Care Representative; and the other is for a part-time assistant . My current CCR has started attending vet tech school and is unavailable a vast majority of the day. Then my current assistant has decided to go full time at the local Animal Emergency Clinic. Thus, the process of hiring begins. It is-and always has been- extremely stressful. It is so hard to judge someone by just a piece of paper; yet it must be done.
I posted an ad on Craigslist.org Tuesday of last week at 9am and also posted the information on my Facebook page so all of my fellow vet friends could see the opportunity. I figured that I would get a few responses that day, and gain a few more during the week. Well, by 11am I had received a total of 47 resumes. So, within 2 hours I had 47; that's more than 20 an hour, almost 1 resume every 3 minutes! I was excited, but my excitement quickly faded to stress and fear at the task that lie ahead.
After looking at about 10 submissions -most a cover letter of some sort and a resume- it became evident that the rate of submission was not going to be enough for me to find the person i needed. I was astounded, disgusted, and ashamed at some of the resumes I had to read. So, as a favor to the world -many of which I believe are currently looking for a job- I am going to tell you just a few things that us managers look for in a resume.
First of all, your cover letter should not consist the following:
- Exclamation points- I don't care how excited you claim to be about any damn opportunity, this is a business relationship and should be regarded as such
- Misspelled words- If you are going to misspell a word on your resume -the most important document in your life next to a diploma- then I sure as hell don't want you working for me, effing up all of my shit
- Assumptions that the individual reading your cover letter is a female. I have a penis, I am a he, sir, or gentleman. By you making assumptions it only shows that you are narrow minded in thought, even when you necessarily may not be.
- Lengthy explanations on how fantastic you are at your present/most recent employer. I will the judge of that. I will call references and see what your actual employer has to say, and let them tell me if you are/were a fantastic employee.
Your cover letter should be brief and to the point. A full page letter is not going to work with my schedule. I want to be able to look at your resume, and cover letter in less than 60 seconds. If it looks good, I will set it in the keep pile, and look at it again.
Your resume is the only thing a future employer has to see your experience, education, skills, and goal without having to talk to you. Yet, within that sheet of paper, your future employer can gain a wealth of knowledge about you as a person.
- Your attention to detail is evident in your resume. Just like a cover letter if something is misspelled don't even bother waiting for a response from your submission. If you are too damn lazy to proof your resume you are obviously to stupid to work for me.
- Who the hell taught you that it's okay for your resume to be 4 pages? Whoever taught you that is a damn idiot and should be ashamed of themselves for even spreading that filthy knowledge. What makes you think I have time to read 4 pages of bullshit? A RESUME SHOULD BE NO MORE THAN 1 PAGE. You're going to have to hit key points and achievements at your past jobs. I don't need to know everything you did and what your responsibilities were.
- No where in a resume do you place past salary.
- No where in a resume do you place abbreviations for degrees, certifications, or organizations. I'm not a damn infinite wealth of knowledge. I don't know what the hell a TCCAC is or who the f*** WKFOA is. Are you stupid? If you abbreviate on a resume then yes, yes you are.
- I want education. Resumes should ALWAYS contain educational information.
- It is of no interest to me your hobbies, kids names, what your spouse/significant other does for a living, or what you do on your free time. That shit does not go on a resume. Focus on getting hired first, not being my friend.
- Where in the great book of life skills does it tell you to have no format? Resumes have a format. If you need to know it then you're not qualified for the job. That should be something you learned in school and valuable information you retained and will retain until your senile ass is doped up on Aricept, trying to not crap your Depends in the nursing home. I would like to take this time to thank my lovely High School English Teacher Mrs. Suzanne Rainey for instilling me with the skills needed to succeed in business.
- Pictures, clip-art, borders, crazy ass fonts, or signatures. What?!? Seriously?
- Your commitment is displayed. If you are bouncing from job to job that looks sketchy. I don't care if you had a baby within three months of getting a job and you left, it looks HORRIBLE on a resume. Your potential employer will only suspect the worst when we see that you were employed from 2006-2007, or even worse, 2006-2006. What the hell is wrong with you that you can't keep a job for longer than a year? Assumptions are made in the submission of your resume, and those assumptions are all a future employer has to go on.
To follow-up on that last point. It is hard to find a job, it is hard to find the job you want. It is even harder to find the job you will love for the rest of your life. Yet, you cannot always settle for a job. There are times where you have to do what you have to do to get the bills paid; yet this should not mean you go apply at a job you know you may leave in 6 months. Who the hell are you to waste an employers time on training when you know you're just going to leave? If you make the employer aware of the fact you are not intending to stay long-term and they still hire you, then great. But you should never withhold the fact that you are only working there to pay bills until a better opportunity comes along. I don't care if it's McDonald's, or picking up cigarette butts up off the floor of a whore house, never in all the days of this world do you have the right and privilege to waste an employers time.
The business world is hard. I never imagined that the atmosphere of the business world would be so, but it is. You have to know what you want, know how to get it, and have the balls to get it.
When I posted the job information on my Facebook page, my dear friend Stephanie expressed interest in the position, but followed up with, "I'm interested, but I don't want to be selfish if others need it that are unemployed. Let me know if others don't work out!"
My answer to Stephanie was:
"There is no such thing as selfish in the business world, You seize the opportunity and if others miss out then they didn't act soon enough. If it's something you want in life you have to go for it, you can't sit around and wait for opportunities to come to you. When an opportunity arises that you thing would be an excellent opportunity or something "you've always wanted to do", you have to act upon it and hope for the best, if it doesn't work out then at least you tried and you can feel confident in that fact. It's when we sit around and let opportunities pass us by when we become sloth."
So, there it is. Sit on that little golden nugget for awhile and, if after 24 hours you still need some explanation, shoot me a comment, and I'll get back to you.
Good luck to all of you trying to find a job. If you need help with your resume, or cover letter, let me know. I'll help you as much as I can.
It's 12 o'clock a.m. and this is Colin.Always. Always.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Introduction to ColinAlways
So, here it is, my very first blog, my very first post on blogspot. Consider this Volume 1 Issue 1.
For those of you wondering, "Why the heck are you starting a blog?" The answer is simple: Someone told me to. No, but seriously; I have always known that I am opinionated, and have strong opinions about many facets of life. I like to think that most of my opinions are the same as many people, but they're to afraid to say it out loud.
Sure, sometimes they things I say don't need to be said out loud, but I figure it's my page, it's my life, and it's my opinion. I am not asking anyone to agree with them, and quite frankly I don't care if you don't agree with me, if you're offended by my opinion, or you think my opinion is outlandish or assanin. I have a solution for you if that is the way you feel.....DON'T READ MY PAGE! Plain and simple.
This being said I will tell you right now, that -not only during my VMA facebook updates- I am often compared to Perez Hilton and Chelsea Lately. Hence the reason I chose to name my page Colin Always. I am simply that, Colin. Always. So if you know anything about either of those individuals you will get a little hint at my views and opinions towards certain things.
Also, I will warn you now that I do cuss, I do call things like I see it, and I do love Jesus. I feel I am entilted to my opinion, but should not be and will not be punished for having them. I am a forgiven individual. No, I do not think I can do anything I want and be welcomed to Heaven anytime no questions asked; but I do believe that God gives us the freedom of choice and I do know the limits and extent of "Freedom in Christ".
So I hope you all enjoy my new blog. Tomorrow I will post Volume 1 Issue 2, of ColinAlways.
For those of you wondering, "Why the heck are you starting a blog?" The answer is simple: Someone told me to. No, but seriously; I have always known that I am opinionated, and have strong opinions about many facets of life. I like to think that most of my opinions are the same as many people, but they're to afraid to say it out loud.
Sure, sometimes they things I say don't need to be said out loud, but I figure it's my page, it's my life, and it's my opinion. I am not asking anyone to agree with them, and quite frankly I don't care if you don't agree with me, if you're offended by my opinion, or you think my opinion is outlandish or assanin. I have a solution for you if that is the way you feel.....DON'T READ MY PAGE! Plain and simple.
This being said I will tell you right now, that -not only during my VMA facebook updates- I am often compared to Perez Hilton and Chelsea Lately. Hence the reason I chose to name my page Colin Always. I am simply that, Colin. Always. So if you know anything about either of those individuals you will get a little hint at my views and opinions towards certain things.
Also, I will warn you now that I do cuss, I do call things like I see it, and I do love Jesus. I feel I am entilted to my opinion, but should not be and will not be punished for having them. I am a forgiven individual. No, I do not think I can do anything I want and be welcomed to Heaven anytime no questions asked; but I do believe that God gives us the freedom of choice and I do know the limits and extent of "Freedom in Christ".
So I hope you all enjoy my new blog. Tomorrow I will post Volume 1 Issue 2, of ColinAlways.
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